PNW Side Personal writing
Personal Side PNW

I was a side long before there was a word for it.

For years, gay sex felt like something I was supposed to understand, want, and perform a certain way.

I didn’t. And I spent a long time assuming that meant something was wrong with me.

This is where I write about that — the before-and-after of the term “side,” and what it changed for me.

What I write about

  • Dating when expectations don’t line up.
  • Sex that doesn’t revolve around penetration.
  • The pressure to fit a role, and what it does to your head.
  • What got better when I stopped forcing it.

Some of this is retrospective. Some of it I’m still working through. If you’ve felt out of sync with how gay sex is usually described, you’ll recognize parts of it.

Resources